extended downtimes, starbucks and abdominal pain get me thinking

I'm absolutely through with Christine. Like, want nothing to do with her-level through. I've been avoiding her for the last three months. The last time I saw her, things ended on nearly the most awkward note imaginable. I was actually thinking while it was happening, "Oh my God, I can't believe I'm heading down this road again." I know where it goes, and I really didn't like it the first time anyway. What would be the point of revisiting this territory?

My mom called me while we were hanging out that night. When we talked later that week she asked if we were together again. I wanted to throw up in my mouth a little bit.

We had slipped into an arrangement that was very convenient and satisfying, but one I was growing increasingly uncomfortable with. Everything about it seemed completely wrong, but perhaps as a testament to her prowess, Christine is a difficult habit to break. It was tough when she asked for help picking out lingerie in Las Vegas. The one night before Christmas was even tougher. But the hardest was when she showed up at my apartment one night after work with the express purpose of "kidnapping" me for private time in her hotel suite. I pulled the shades and hid under my bed covers until she left.

I think she's got the idea. Her photos on Flickr clearly document that event invitations I used to get are now going to other people, and it sounds like she's romantically linked to someone else. I sort of miss being spoiled with the trips and concert tickets, and at certain weak moments I think back on times with her. Interestingly enough, she introduced me to "The Office." She's a lot like the character Jan -- highly successful and powerful, yet utterly self-conscious and increasingly unstable.

But I'm no Michael Scott. I think I'm most like Ryan. And as he eloquently put it to Kelly, "You and I are done."